My face in this picture pretty much sums up how I was all day yesterday:



...mostly I hate the way I photograph, but in this case, I just don't care XD

AWESOMEST

DAY

EVER




It has been said, I am sure it shall be said again for many years to come. I don't care. Because the fact still remains. The Crescent + York = match made in heaven.





Point of interest: it is now 22:58. It took me THAT LONG to write this thing.

I found this on the website of White Eagle Martial Arts...it is the organization that hosts the Karate Class that we will be enrolling Josh in.

And this story hit me so hard, because it works for both of us...and gives me something really concrete to work with.

(I wanted to just link to the story, but couldn't, so I'm copying it here with the copyright notice intact)


The six angers

ã Copyright 2004 Nor R. Brunschwyler


She gave birth to eight children, lost one as an infant and raised seven in the midst of The Great Depression and a world war. During those years the Brunschwyler matriarch, Margaret, made patience an art, deepened her insight and added extensively to the sum of her wisdom. Her children grown, she foresaw in a dream there was one more to care for and awaited my arrival. As her ninth progeny I became the recipient of that patience, insight and wisdom. It was the way of this female Solomon to turn dissonance into a life lesson. So it was on a day when I threw a teenage tantrum.


Shouting the age-old “You never let me do anything!” I slammed the door to my room and threw myself on the bed. In the teen mind portraying oneself as a victim is supposed make the adult come running with an apology. An hour later no one had come pleading for entry or begging forgiveness. I couldn’t wait any longer. Ending my self-imposed exile I went downstairs to find grandmother Margaret reading in the living room. Stomping past her and flopping into a pouting posture on the couch to the right of her chair I waited for her to break the silence. Five minutes was all I could take.


“Why did you ruin my Saturday?”

Lowering the book she removed her glasses but kept them in her hand.

“How did I ruin this day for you?”

If she was going to engage in lengthy conversation she would have closed the book and placed it with her glasses on the table beside her chair. I knew that if I quipped back the glasses would return to her face and the book to reading position.

“I missed seeing the movie. It’s already started and the theatre will not be showing it again.”

“How is it you missed the movie?”

“You wouldn’t give me my allowance so I had no money.”

“Why did you not receive your allowance?”

“Because I didn’t finish my chores.” Before she could reply I added, “I know the rules but I promised I was going to finish them after the show.”

“You work at the library part time, where is that money?”

“In my savings account. The bank closed at noon. I was counting on my allowance.”

“Does the library pay you before or after you do work for them?”

“After.” It was clear to me that I was the maker of my own misery. Had I got started on my chores earlier I would have finished on time. “Okay, it was my own fault.”

I arose from the couch to complete the work that entitled me to a stipend when she said, “Before you leave we need to examine the way you acted.” Apparently there was more than one lesson to be learned. She closed the book in her lap, folded her glasses and set them both on the table as I returned to the couch.

“What were you feeling when you went to your room?” She was careful not to describe my emotional exit in a judgmental manner.

“I was angry.”

“Sit with me.” Having heard this request many times I took my place on the footstool of her chair.

“There are six angers. To understand each is to understand their origins. To understand their origins is to understand what leads us to anger. I will share them with you and when I am finished you can tell me which was yours today.

The first anger is displeasure. When humans have a strong feeling of dissatisfaction this is the anger within them. It comes from a forceful desire for reality to be something other than what it is.

Next is the anger of resentment. Dissatisfaction smolders within us and is not brought to satisfaction causing this anger to live in our hearts.

The third is jealousy. Born in the fear of or an actual loss, this dissatisfaction can hold within it the angers of displeasure and resentment.

Fourth is wrath, the sum of the lower angers with a desire to punish.

The most dangerous is rage. Dissatisfaction in a person who does not know how to guide dissatisfaction to acceptance will engage in uncontrolled destruction.”

She waited as I considered her words. “Which of these angers was yours?”

“I was displeased. I had no resentment.” A flush came over my face.“ I am ashamed.” I stuttered. “I… I wanted to… punish you. I wanted you to feel bad. And… I was not in control of myself so I slammed the door to my room.” I looked down in disgrace.

Grandmother took my chin and raised my face. With a soft voice she said “In your shame you have found wisdom.” Tears came to my eyes for having even the slightest feeling of ill for one who loved me. She handed me a tissue from the box on the table beside her.

Drying my eyes I asked, “What am I to do when I am angry again? I do not want to be out of control.”

“Desiring control is the first step.” The word “first” triggered a realization.

“You said there were six angers.” I recited them back to her. “Displeasure, resentment, jealousy, wrath and rage… what is the sixth?”

She grinned in delight that I had been listening. “When the awareness of a negative consequence to another causes you discomfort, uneasiness, or pain then you will experience enlightened displeasure. You will be dissatisfied but rather than wanting to blame, penalize or strike out you will seek solutions. Such solutions will be focused on the well-being of the other. If there is no solution, accept how the universe as it is.

All anger rises from selfishness. It is the emotion of a child that does not get its way.”

Leaping from the footstool I hugged grandmother. Her unspoken forgiveness came from unconditional love as much as from wisdom. Kissing her cheek I told her I better finish what I was paid to do.

From that time I have reflected on each instance of anger and identified which I had been in accordance with. This allowed me to know its origin and frequency. I discovered that when we want for others what we want for ourselves, the first five angers have no place to live.

About an hour ago, neoclue went outside to get some things out of the car. He came in with a puzzled look on his face. "There is a little cat with a squirrel's tail on our front porch." I thought he was kidding at first, but went out and looked at her, and sure enough, a little cat (looks like maybe about 9-10 months old) grey striped with white socks, and a really, REALLY bushy tail, is hanging out on our porch. She's tried to get into the house several times, and keeps going back and forth between the front and back door. (yes, it definitely a girl, I checked). She's very friendly, she let me pick her up and stroke her. She's a little thin, but not malnourished, but I've never seen her around here before. She seems desperate to get inside (it is cold and wet outside, after all) and I put a little dish of kitten chow down, and she chowed down voraciously. The weirdest thing is, neo went outside, and he didn't hiss at her, he just kind of sniffed at her, rubbed up against her a few times and then walked away. So either he knows her, or she just doesn't smell like a threat of any kind.

There are so many cats in this neighborhood, but none of them ever do this. I'm just wondering why, of all the houses on the street, she wants in to this house. Right now, she's mewling pitifully outside my front window.

*sigh*

No. I cannot have any more cats.

If she's still around tomorrow, I'll ask around and see if anyone recognizes her.

 Helen: I FOUND MY KEYS!
Me: Oh? Where were they?
Helen: IN MY VANITY CASE WITH ALL MY MAKE-UP!
Me: ...it least they were in a safe place, then.
Helen: EXACTLY! 


Assignment is done. I got out of the flat at three, got the bugger handed in, and rejoiced. Also got my boks back to the library, and dropped by the corner shop for celeratory food. I wanted biscuits. And for some reason, an onion bhaji. And I needed cheese and milk, and coke seemed the obvious addition to that lot

...he gave me a little bag of sweets. I mean, it was just a ten, twenty p mix but still. I was all like, 'd'awwwwww :3' 


... AND IT'S YORK TOMORROW *runs around in small circles* plushies for all. Well. Two. And madcap camera mania ^___^ 

Also? I have a huge block on the lyrics of one of my favourite songs. I have bits of it floating around, and I know if I put them together they'd be one verse, just NOT IN THE RIGHT ORDER.

...Methinks I shall be perusing Dad's lyrics file when I get home.

What is it about green olives and beer that makes them go together so well?

Today is a good day ^___^

Despite paying through the nose for train tickets - I mean, really, it was much, MUCH more than I expected - I am happy and content. Since today's MedLit was a revision seminar that's running again tomorrow, I decided not to go, so I just had Greek at nine. There were three of us, myself included :|

I kicked ass. We had no preparation for the lesson, and I had answers for all the questions straight away. A few mistakes here and there, but that's to be expected. Walked down to the station right afterwards for tickets, but I've already talked about those. I picked up some cameras - you know me and my disposable cameras - and I WANT PHOTOS. Lots and LOTS of photos for my Wall of Shame next year :p If I use them both, I'll have 54 ^___^

I had lunch in the park around St Thomas'. It was nice :D I think last time I had lunch there it was cold and I couldn't feel my bum when I got up, so it made a nice change!

The weather forcast for Saturday looks good.

There's a small cafe asking for part time help - the same one I've been thinking of getting a job at for a while - and they have been since January. If there are no takers when I come back for my second year, I'll see about getting a job there.

I need employment in Sheffield, not least because I broke into the money I'd set aside for Dad in my Natwest account for the tickets (...), and I need spending money for Sparta Greece. And the York trip will probably deplete that. So much for my plans!!! 

I'll be looking into that when I go back; between revsion stints. Mum's looking into call centres and the stationers' in Stocksbridge, and I'll be looking into the job situation at Meadowhall, see what I can come up with. I'm thinking full time - A job I can start when I get back from my exams and take through until September. I don't need to tell them I'm leaving until I have to hand in my notice. Unless they ask... 

Oh andand? I had to stop to readjust my bags and stuff on the way back... I put them down on a wall and one of the Ricky Road cats came bounding over to look inside. I told him gently there was nothing inside for cats - he went to my other side to look in my books bag, but all there was in there was my LSJ. I stroked him instead and I hope he was satisfied :p

First event in asylumproject starts this weekend =D  

If that's not subtle pimpage, I don't know what is.

Had a major icon reshuffle, since I was getting bored of them :p I should do the same here.

...Helen is playing Newton Faulker REALLY loudly, but I think the bass just broke. All I can hear is his voice - a few seconds ago the bass was shaking my floor :|

To everyone here, but especially toneoclue, naunna, magcat, denisessential and freyas_fire...

I love you.
It's not a weight you must carry around.
I love you.
It's not a box that holds you in.
I love you.
It's not a standard you have to bear.
I love you.
It's not a sacrifice I make.
I love you.
It's not a pedestal you are frozen upon.
I love you.
It's not an expectation of perfection.
I love you.
It's not my life's whole purpose (or yours).
I love you.
It's not to make you change.
I love you.
It's not even to make you love me.
I love you.

It's as pure and simple as that.

-Anonymous

(thank you popfiend)

I got up early to try to finsh my essay. It was a massive failure.

HOWEVER. I have to finish off a paragraph on Torvald, get one done on Christina, and then I can conclude this thing and go home.

Well. I can't. But I can conclude this thing, hand it in, come back and do my Greek assignment. Goody ^__^

 Something weird is afoot in Ricky Road, and has been afoot since about 1.

and the thing is, I'm TRYING to concentrate on this essay, but I can hear them RIGHT THROUGH MY WINDOW since they're fucking CAMPED OUTSIDE IT.

I hope they go on a mass exodus and leave me to it -_-

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying now, shaping your spring. Post these instructions in your LJ along with your 7 songs. Then tag 7 other people to see what they're listening to.

1. The Loch and the Maiden (You and I and the Sky) - Karine Polwart
2. FUZZ - MUCC
3. Forbidden Things - Youjeen
4. Knights of Cydonia - Muse
5. Love turns 40 - Vienna Teng
6. Girls' Fights - Yuki Koyanagi
7. The Wife of Usher's Well - Karine Polwart

.... that's a fair mix.

I tag the Crescent and... pirate_yomi, galenhiril, sugarpunchand elict. Yes, techinically that's eight, but I don't expect Ruth to update, let alone check her friendslist over the next few days.

Watch me be proved wrong...


Might update with download links later, we'll seeeeee :)

*is hungry*

*should drag self to kitchen for food before it gets overrun*

*cannot be bothered*

The flat is a pretty bleak place these days. Mostly due to the birthday celebration that has been in progress since Thursday night, and it still going :| I have holed myself up in my room, because I am not a social creature, and do not want to be in the way of rampaging drunks who can't believe the equally-drunk friend they put up for the night stole their bed.

That was Gareth on Friday night. He wandered around the flat for about an hour, repeating 'I can't believe the bastard stole my bed', and mistaking me for Heather (...how?).  So yeah, I'm staying here for my own safety.

I want to have my Ibsen essay finished, and at least up to the third question of my Greek done  by Monday evening. And I want to TRY to have the Greek handed in early.

A bill before the state of Ohio congress (HB-545) seeks to limit the money-lenders to an APR of 28%. Of course the loan sharks, err somewhat legal money-lenders, are up in arms about this. They don't want to lose their cash cow of over 200% APR. Of course the scare tactics are in full-force.

In this current time in America, where people are losing their jobs, the country is in recession (admit it President Bush and move on), and foreclosures are happening hourly, this is one way to stop some of the bleeding. In reality, these companies are no better than parasites. If I did the same thing without a license, I would be arraigned as a racketeer, or worse organized crime.

Yes, the bill will upset the poor. They tend to depend on these parasites to pay their bills. And it is a revolving door. They get money for bills, pay the bills, and owe more than the bills. While I empathize with the poor, it is time for even them to learn budgeting. Yes, it sucks not having money to buy meat, but that is not your permanent role in life. Find a higher paying job, get a better education, and move up. Simple as that, especially now that Congress has approved more money for college loans.

If it was me, I would not even allow these companies to operate in the state. These are not banks; these are predators. There is a difference. Kill the predators.

So, this weekend, I am away at The Great Green America Fest. I'm not going to go out of my way to explain it...follow the link. ;)

Its on the grounds of the PA Ren Faire, which means that we get to be on faire grounds and see people we haven't seen since the end of October. It feels so good to be in familiar surroundings..more and more this place feels like home to me.

Today was a school day, and normally at faire, school days are generally not all that prosperous, but today was an exception. We had a great group of kids, and financially did really well. For my own part, I made enough to cover the cost of the space for the weekend in just the first day, so that is a VERY good sign. Everything after this is basically gravy. :)

We will have a new space this year at the Celtic Fling and Faire...I will let everyone know as we get closer (I don't want to jinx it until we're actually set up in that space) but it promises to be a much better traffic area than where we were before. I'm so psyched, I can't even begin to voice it.

And now, I must away to relax, becuase I have been awake without any sleep since....8 am on Thursday. Yep. Thursday. And while I'm exhausted, I'm actually a little too wound up right now to actually sleep, so I'm just going to relax for a while. ;)

Ta!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RUTH!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RACHEL!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY defeating!

 ....and Helen, but she's not here, sooo...

I swear, I know more people born on the second of May than.... yeah..... so I feel like I've missed somebody O_O



....I was going to sayy that it's a good day in Lena-land, but then someone attacked me on Facebook messenger. And I was optimistic about getting some work done before MedLit, too :(

...it's still a good day, though. I originally woke up at about half ten, and then was comatose until my alarm went off - and then I did wake up. Quite a feat: Ticho knows what time I went to bed!

So yeah, if I get out of this conversation, I'm going to get going on that assignment. And maybe get a start on that Ibsen essay when I get back. I need to take advantage of this weekend to work.... I wonder if that's going to happen (?). I also need to make up Ticho's plushie request. Trev's is done, but I think I fluffed some of the detaling on the uniform... and still no tie :| Though I might be able to sort that out *plottingsss*

You can still tell who it's supposed to be, though. 



On a completely unrelated note, I am considering taking my guitar into town one day and busking. I just need to find some English songs to sing :3 

EDIT: OK, in this conversation I found out that most people from high school have had very fulfilling lives, having children at, like, sixteen. That's British culture for you. 

And this amuses me. Mainly the comments it sparked, though I admit it was partly my fault.

(and the Ouran-moment graffiti from AGES ago between Chloe and Tich. *shakes fist* Making fun of meeeeeee :p)